November 20, 2023

'Mr. and Mrs. Smith'

After five to six years of podcasting, The Ringer's Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Amanda Dobbins head to podcast therapy to reignite their stagnating love of podcasts. To keep the spark alive in "Wait, This Movie Made HOW Much Money?" Month, they rewatch the 2005 action-comedy 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith,' starring Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.

Movie poster

Cast

Brad Pitt as John Smith

Angelina Jolie as Jane Smith

Vince Vaughn as Eddie

Kerry Washington as Jasmine

Adam Brody as Benjamin Danz

Keith David as Father

Chris Weitz as Neighbor

Directed by: Doug Liman

Written by: Simon Kinberg

Categories

Roger Ebert's review

Quote from Rog's review:

There's a kind of movie that consists entirely of watching two people on the screen. The plot is immaterial. What matters is the chemistry.

Lamented that people now ask about celebrities' private lives instead of which films to see.

Most re-watchable scene
  • The Bogota assassinations – she's dressed as a dominatrix, he's at a poker game, she jumps off the hotel roof.
  • The dinner scene where they both know – 'I added peas,' the wine bottle drop, the poison.
  • Marriage counseling scenes – 'How often do you have sex?' 'I don't understand the question'.
What aged the best?
  • The paparazzi/tabloid era and Us Weekly culture.
  • Angelina Jolie's physicality – bouncing on a chair, calling him a 'pussy'.
  • Vince Vaughn's mid-2000s renaissance; Kerry Washington and Angelina in the same movie.
Most cinematic shot
  • Angelina descending from the Bogota hotel with the purse.
  • Angelina sliding across the foyer with a gun during the house fight.
Best needle drop
  • A cover version of 'Lay Lady Lay' (Bob Dylan).
  • 'Baby Baby' by Amy Grant playing while they spy on the neighbors.
Weak link of the movie

The third act – once both know the other is a spy and they team up, the tension disappears and it becomes a generic action movie for 35 minutes.

What aged the worst?
  • Doug Liman's various quotes about the on-set romance and Angelina's behavior.
  • Brad and Angelina's actual relationship ending in bitter divorce.
  • Cutting the steamy sex scene for PG-13 rating.
The hottest take award
  • The Brad/Angelina/Aniston love triangle was the greatest thing that ever happened to Jennifer Aniston's career.
  • Are these people so hot it's not even relatable/erotic?
Casting what-ifs
  • Brad Pitt and Nicole Kidman were originally cast; Kidman had to leave.
  • Johnny Depp and Cate Blanchett, Will Smith and Catherine Zeta-Jones were considered.
  • Liman wanted Gwyneth Paltrow because she and Pitt were real exes.
Over-acting award

Vince Vaughn – 'They knew and they let it happen' monologue; basically doing Will Ferrell from 'Wedding Crashers'.

Best "that guy"
  • Chris Weitz – the neighbor with the red oak floors.
  • Stephanie March, Jennifer Morrison, Perry Reeves – the I-Team non-Kerry Washington division.
Apex Mountain
  • Both Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie – though Pitt has an argument for 'Moneyball' too.
  • 21st century celebrity culture – yes.
  • Adam Brody – season one of The O.C. plus this movie, peak Adam Brody.
Re-casting couch
  • Vince Vaughn's role: Owen Wilson or 2005-era Bradley Cooper.
  • Modern Mr. & Mrs. Smith: Tom Holland and Zendaya, or Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone.
Half-assed (internet) research
  • Budget $110 million, made $487 million worldwide.
  • 50 drafts of the script; writers included Terrence Winter, Carrie Fisher, Akiva Goldsman.
  • People of Colombia were not happy about the film's depiction; the president was upset.
Picking nits
  • Bogota hotel lobby depicted as sweltering, but real Bogota is 9,000 feet above sea level.
  • 70 assassins, zero bullet hits in the final shootout.
  • The $400K price on their heads seems absurdly low given their lifestyle.
Sequel, prequel, prestige TV or untouchable?
  • Amazon tried with Donald Glover and Phoebe Waller-Bridge; COVID and creative differences derailed it.
  • Maya Erskine took the role opposite Glover.
Would this movie be better with...?

Catherine Hahn on the I-Team.

Just one Oscar, who gets it?

Jolie – she's better than Pitt in the movie.

(Probably) unanswerable questions
  • How do you install a weapons stove? How many people in the world would know how to do it?
  • Why does Angelina's team have a skyscraper HQ while Brad works in a shitty garage with Vince Vaughn?
Best double feature for this movie
  • Duplicity (Tony Gilroy, Clive Owen & Julia Roberts).
  • Grosse Pointe Blank.
What memorabilia would you want (or not want!) from the movie?
  • The matching track suits.
  • The secret knife shelf inside the oven.
Best (or worst!) life lessons from the movie

Don't let your husband make a movie with Angelina Jolie in the mid-2000s.

Who won the movie?

Chris: Brangelina (the concept); Amanda: Brad Pitt – emerged unscathed and it kickstarted an amazing career run.

Producer review

Craig Horlbeck.