Rewatchables Reference

• Bill Hader: Robert Stack's monologue at the end where he keeps talking after Robert Hays leaves – 'municipal bonds, Ted' / 'kicked in the head with an iron boot.'
• Bill Simmons: The cockpit scenes (Captain Oveur with Joey – 'Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?') and the inflatable pilot scene.

• Bill Simmons: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (just won the 1980 NBA title, peak of career).
• Bill Hader: The Anita Bryant concert joke.
• Also: disco is dead joke (the 'where disco lives forever' sign getting destroyed – reportedly the biggest laugh in theaters), smoking/non-smoking sections on the plane, Hare Krishnas in airports.

• The overall premise (food poisoning on a plane, erratic pilot must land).
• Being stuck next to someone on a plane who won't shut up – universally relatable.
• Hidden background jokes you don't catch the first time.
• The wordplay ('A hospital – it's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now').
• Leslie Nielsen becoming a comedy actor (unleashed into Naked Gun, Police Squad, etc.).
• Bill Hader: The movie being a one-of-one, impossible to compare to anything else.

• Robert Stack taking $20K extra instead of a percentage of the movie (which made almost $200 million).
• The jive scene causing chaos when dubbed into other languages.
• Leslie Nielsen slapping the woman twice (the second gratuitous slap).
• The Africa/basketball scene.

Winner: The sped-up Bee Gees in the disco scene ('Saturday Night Fever' parody).

• Bill Simmons: The movie is 5 minutes too short. Could have used one more scene with the jive guys, Stephen Stucker appearing in the first half, one more round of kids acting like adults.
• Bill Hader and Craig both disagree – they like that it leaves you wanting more at 88 minutes.

Bill Simmons: Lorna Patterson should have been a bigger star.

• Ted Striker was written for David Letterman (auditioned, didn't pull it off). Studio pushed Barry Manilow. Fred Willard turned it down.
• Dr. Rumack (Leslie Nielsen's role): Turned down by Dom DeLuise, Christopher Lee, Vincent Price, and Jack Webb. Both Lee and Price said it was the biggest mistake of their careers.
• Roger Murdoch (Kareem's role): They originally wanted Pete Rose, but it was baseball season.
• Peter Graves initially said no because he thought the script was tasteless.
• Bruce Jenner auditioned and didn't get it.

• Winner: The actor who plays Jim (the husband/coffee commercial parody) – appeared as the dad in 'Risky Business', was on Beverly Hills 90210.
• Runner-up: Jonathan Banks (air traffic controller; later Mike in Breaking Bad).

• Nominees: Ethel Merman, Kareem, the Jive guys, Lloyd Bridges, Stephen Stucker.
• Winner: Stephen Stucker – 'comes out of nowhere and just owns the movie.'

Bill Simmons: Add Lynda Carter (Wonder Woman) for 90 seconds on the plane – some sort of era-specific celebrity cameo.

• The red zone/white zone couple were the real-life married couple who recorded the LAX announcement tapes.
• Ethel Merman's final acting role (died 1984, age 76).
• Elmer Bernstein understood immediately what goofy tone they wanted for the score.
• Al White wrote the jive dialogue (and Barbara Billingsley's lines) using books on Black English.
• Cut joke: an attractive woman walking through the airport who turns and hawks a loogie on the wall (nobody laughed in screenings).

• Robert Hays: Yes.
• Julie Hagerty: No – probably Lost in America (Albert Brooks).
• Zuckers and Abrahams: Debate between Airplane and Naked Gun.
• Spoof movies as a genre: Simmons votes Airplane as the best spoof movie ever made.
• Stephen Stucker: Yes.
• Kareem Abdul-Jabbar: Yes (just won the 1980 NBA title).
• Lorna Patterson: Unfortunately yes.

Both pick Spielberg. Rationale: Spielberg had already done something similar-ish with 1941. The movie needs to look 'janky,' which fits Spielberg better.

• Flipped to: What role would Bill Hader want?
• Bill Hader: Lloyd Bridges – loves the arc of a guy who starts calm and in control, then completely unravels.
• Bill Simmons expected Hader to pick Peter Graves (cockpit scenes).

• Bill Simmons: The water nailing Ted and Elaine on the beach (From Here to Eternity parody).
• Bill Hader: The cockpit lighting changing to horror-movie style when they tell Ted he has to land the plane.

• Ted Striker's war timeline is confusing – he's about 27 in 1980, but the flashbacks look like WWII.
• The sick little girl's IV tube getting knocked out causing instant convulsions doesn't make medical sense.
• Where did they put all the sick people on the plane?

Airplane II: The Sequel exists. Different filmmakers made it. Set in space.

Both agree: the screenplay. Also: Leslie Nielsen for Supporting Actor.

• Did planes actually have inflatable pilots in 1980, or was that made up?
• The nude scene actress is unknown – remains a genuine mystery.

• Bill Hader: The exterior model of the plane used for cutaway shots.
• Bill Simmons: The inflatable autopilot (Otto), but it was in Jerry Zucker's garage for years and disintegrated into 'rubber dust.'

• Don't forget to zag – use non-comedy actors and play it straight.
• Stick to your instincts and make something new.

• Bill Hader: Naked Gun. Alternative: Zero Hour! + Airplane!
• Bill Simmons: Agrees Zero Hour! + Airplane! could be really fun.

• Bill Hader: Stephen Stucker or Leslie Nielsen.
• Bill Simmons: Leslie Nielsen – 'it completely changed his career and then he ended up getting another 20 years.'

Craig Horlbeck loves the movie, grew up watching it via his dad. Praises the 'jokes per minute' hard-joke style. His favorite quiet scene: the post-blowjob shot of Julie Hagerty and the inflatable pilot sitting awkwardly next to each other, both smoking.