December 24, 2023

'Under Siege'

The Ringer's Bill Simmons hires Kyle Brandt, an ex-Navy SEAL turned podcaster, to rewatch the 1992 action thriller 'Under Siege,' starring Steven Seagal, Tommy Lee Jones, and Gary Busey.

Movie poster

Cast

Steven Seagal as Casey Ryback

Tommy Lee Jones as Stranix

Gary Busey as Commander Krill

Erika Eleniak as Jordan Tate

Colm Meaney as Daumer

Directed by: Andrew Davis

Written by: J. F. Lawton

Categories

Roger Ebert's review

Quote from Rog's review:

The formula was obvious. Die Hard goes to sea. I walked into the screening in a cynical frame of mind. But then a funny thing happened. The movie started working for me.

Siskel said: 'One of the best times you're going to have at a movie this year.'

Most re-watchable scene
  • The opening kitchen scene – Seagal cooking, Busey spits in the bouillabaisse, Seagal punches Busey.
  • Tommy Lee's 'Welcome to the Revolution' speech – in leather jacket, bandana, and sunglasses.
  • The big reveal that Ryback is actually a decorated Navy SEAL.
  • The Tommy Lee Jones vs Seagal knife fight – finger through the eye, then puts him in the microwave.
  • The forced kiss at the end – 'Here's one move.'
What aged the best?
  • Really good character entrances – Seagal, Tommy Lee Jones, Erika Eleniak.
  • Seagal's non-funny jokes – unintentionally hilarious.
  • Gary Busey still in drag: 'Do I look like I need a psychological evaluation?'
  • The terrorists having fun – cracking champagne, playing rock and roll.
  • Jimi Hendrix 'Voodoo Child' needle drop during the revolution scene.
Best needle drop

Jimi Hendrix 'Voodoo Child' – plays when Tommy Lee's crew blows up the first jet, pops champagne, 'Welcome to the revolution.' Absolutely iconic use.

Weak link of the movie
  • Erika Eleniak's character – jumps out of a cake and within 30 minutes is part of a counter military coup.
  • Seagal benched for too long – hurts the movie compared to Harrison Ford staying active in Air Force One.
What aged the worst?
  • All the Seagal stuff – his reputation and behavior.
  • The era of gratuitous action movie nudity.
  • Captain Adams – worst dead guy acting ever, can see him breathe and blink.
  • The obvious Tommy Lee Jones body double in the final fight.
  • 'Here's one move' – the forced kiss at the end.
The hottest take award
  • Kyle: 'The Fugitive' would have been a better movie if Steven Seagal played Dr. Richard Kimball.
  • Bill: Tommy Lee Jones plays the exact same character in 'Under Siege' and 'The Fugitive' – same performance, just one has good intentions and the other bad. He wins the Oscar for essentially the same role.
Casting what-ifs
  • Harrison Ford agreed to do 'The Fugitive' after seeing a rough cut of 'Under Siege'.
  • James Woods was supposed to play the Tommy Lee Jones villain role.
Over-acting award

Gary Busey – 'The hardest we've had in a while.'

Best "that guy"
  • Dwayne Davis – 'Alvin Mack' from 'The Program', also in Necessary Roughness and Beetlejuice.
  • Glenn Morshower – the red-headed guy from 24.
  • Colm Meaney – starts with an American accent and gives up, 'he's Irish for his last 5 scenes.'
Best "heat check" performance

The unnamed war room soldier who delivers: 'Approximately 1 million people will reach 10,000 degrees Fahrenheit in less than a second.' Won on the strength of that one line.

Re-casting couch
  • Joe Pantoliano in the Colm Meaney role.
  • Samuel L. Jackson in the Gary Busey role – 'He's just a cook, motherfucker.'
  • Philip Baker Hall as the captain.
Half-assed (internet) research
  • Budget $35 million, grossed $156.6 million. 2 Oscar nominations for sound.
  • Original spec script called 'Dreadnought' by J.F. Lawton, sold for $1 million.
  • Erika Eleniak's first feature film role at age 12 was the girl Elliot kissed in E.T.
  • Shot on the USS Alabama in Mobile, AL (not the real USS Missouri).
  • Harrison Ford signed on for 'The Fugitive' after seeing a rough cut of this film.
  • Most successful film at the time not screened for critics prior to release.
Apex Mountain
  • Steven Seagal – yes. 'Under Siege is the one.' Then went downhill with On Deadly Ground.
  • Erika Eleniak – yes.
  • Tommy Lee Jones – not quite yet, 'The Fugitive'/No Country are bigger.
  • Gary Busey – debatable between Buddy Holly Story, 'Point Break', and this.
Picking nits
  • How did 20+ armed terrorists just get onto a nuclear battleship?
  • A 'surprise party' as the cover story for a nuclear battleship hijacking.
  • Only one girl for the party? 'How about 6 girls?'
  • Colm Meaney starts American and gives up – Irish for his last 5 scenes.
  • He tells someone to take his pies out of the oven, but the US Navy only uses electric ovens.
  • The terrible final line: 'Keep the faith, Stranix.'
(Probably) unanswerable questions
  • Can Casey Ryback actually cook? We never actually see him cooking.
  • Did Seagal need the ponytail? (This is the only movie without it.)
  • Worst body of any action hero ever?
What memorabilia would you want (or not want!) from the movie?
  • The 'Under Siege' menu – Pasta Rybecchio, Casey's Kimchi – framed on a wall.
  • Tommy Lee Jones's aviator sunglasses and leather jacket.
Best double feature for this movie

'The Fugitive' – 'this is how 'The Fugitive' came to be.'

Who won the movie?

Tommy Lee Jones – got his role in 'The Fugitive' from this, won the Oscar, still doing insurance commercials for $2 million an hour.