October 01, 2024

'The Blair Witch Project'

The Ringer's Bill Simmons and Chris Ryan hike into the Black Hills near Burkittsville, Maryland, to rewatch the 1999 horror phenomenon 'The Blair Witch Project,' starring Heather Donahue, Michael C. Williams, and Joshua Leonard.

Notes

  • Budget between $200K and $500K; grossed nearly $250 million (10th biggest movie of 1999). Best budget-to-revenue ratio of any movie ever.
  • Sold to Artisan Entertainment for $1.1 million.
  • The directors deliberately messed with the actors during the 8-day shoot – reduced food, disrupted sleep, shook the tent at night. Actors signed a release to 'mess with your head.'
  • Originally Mike was supposed to disappear, but due to tension between Josh Leonard and Heather Donahue during filming, they pulled Josh instead.
  • Heather Donahue's mother received sympathy cards from people who believed her daughter was actually dead.
  • They had to tear down the Griggs House because fans kept trying to break off pieces as memorabilia.
  • Originally called 'The Blair Witch Tapes'; code name during production was 'The Woods.'
  • Both Bill and Chris saw it opening night at Kendall Square in Cambridge, MA and describe it as the single most frightening theater experience of their lives.
  • The three actors got 'jobbed' financially – no points, no bonuses, careers essentially over after. Heather changed her name to Rei Hance and became a medical marijuana grower.

Categories

Roger Ebert's review

Quote from Rog's review:

It was an extraordinarily effective horror film. At a time when digital techniques can show us almost anything, The Blair Witch Project is a reminder that what really scares us is the stuff we can't see.
Most re-watchable scene
  • Winner: the last 15 minutes – finding the house and the ending with Mike standing in the corner (Chris, Bill agrees).
  • Other contenders: getting drunk at the hotel, finding the crazy part of the forest, Josh disappearing, Heather finding the finger/tongue in Josh's shirt, Heather's confessional.
  • Chris special mention: coming across the same log after walking for 11 hours – 'created a phobia' about getting lost in the woods.
The most 1999 thing about this movie
  • Bill: one of the video cameras was bought at Circuit City, and after filming they returned it for a refund.
  • Chris: Josh's car – 'a very 1999 car, the kind a broke college student would be driving.'
  • The nascent internet making the marketing work; everyone smoking cigarettes.
What aged the best?
  • The group dynamic – how fear jumps from person to person (Chris).
  • Making one victim stand in the corner with their back to the second murder (Bill).
  • The actors signed a release to 'Mess with Your Head' so reactions are genuine.
  • The Curse of the Blair Witch companion documentary.
  • Walking in a circle and ending up at the same spot.
What aged the worst?
  • Big fat handheld cameras; Heather's nostrils in HD on modern TVs.
  • No fun/connecting scene in the first 25 minutes to make you care about the characters (Bill).
  • The three actors got financially 'jobbed' – no points, careers essentially over (Chris).
  • The botched sequel – Artisan rushed it; Myrick and Sanchez walked away.
Weak link of the movie
  • Bill: hard to accept how they got this lost in the woods.
  • Chris: the setup/interviews in town are somewhat repetitive; would have preferred more time in the woods.
The hottest take award
  • Chris: 'Curse of the Blair Witch is almost better' – would love a 2.5-hour assembly combining both.
  • Bill: this is one of the most messed-up franchises ever – 'There should have been ten of these.' Could have done the Yellowstone model with multiple prequels. 'This is a multi-billion dollar franchise' that was squandered.
Over-acting award

Mike before they realize they're being terrorized, when he's getting 'super aggro' too early (Bill).

Best "that guy"
  • Bill: the mom who covers her mouth during the interview.
  • Chris: Ed Swanson, the younger fisherman.
Half-assed (internet) research
  • Heather Donahue's mother received sympathy cards from people who believed her daughter was actually dead.
  • The shoot was 8 days; the actors never knew the Blair Witch was fake.
  • Thousands of people went to Maryland hoping to find the Blair Witch legend.
  • Josh's CP-16 camera sold on eBay for about $10K.
  • Reddit theory that Mary (the crazy lady at the beginning) is the witch, based on a Genesis Bible quote about rock piles.
Apex Mountain
  • Everyone in the movie and the directors.
  • Sundance (Bill): 'This big movie became a top ten movie and a phenomenon based on a Sundance screening.'
  • Viral marketing (Chris).
  • Artisan Entertainment – 250x'd their investment.
Cruise or Hanks?
Hanks wins

Young Hanks (1981 era) as Mike.

Picking nits
  • How did they have this much camera battery for 6 days in the woods?
  • Why didn't they have more cigarettes for a multi-day trip?
  • The camera equipment should be ditched first when they're lost and dying (Chris).
What memorabilia would you want (or not want!) from the movie?
  • Josh's CP-16 camera (sold for ~$10K on eBay).
  • Heather's journal (Chris).
  • Mike's last cigarette / crumpled cigarette pack (Chris).
Best (or worst!) life lessons from the movie
  • 'Don't fuck with witches, burial grounds, or the woods' (Bill).
  • 'Don't leave eyeshot of the car' (Chris).
Best double feature for this movie
  • Chris: The Curse of the Blair Witch (the companion Sci-Fi Channel documentary, ~44 minutes).
  • Bill: Paranormal Activity as 'the 1.0 and 2.0 version.'
Who won the movie?
  • Bill: Artisan Entertainment (250x'd their investment).
  • Chris: the filmmakers, for revitalizing the found footage horror genre.
Producer review

Craig watched it at 7:30 AM his first time. Found it less scary than expected – 'we're desensitized now.' His closing thought: 'Apex Mountain for you-had-to-be-there moments.'